Sunday, April 18, 2010

Parents Pick Your Battles

On the way home from Church today I found myself, as usual, telling random things to my husband. It started with Isaac burping and then saying "Ha, Isabel, I burped on you!" The other incident that reminded of my upbringing was Isabel complaining about Olivia and Monica sharing secrets and not telling her about them. Secret sharing was a big no no at my house! It would get you a look of death if mom caught you.

I told him my parents were obsessed with manners, you couldn't sing at the table, no burping, no tooting, no picking your nose and no sharing secrets, among many many other bad manners, accident or not, they were not tolerated. I have nothing against good manners, in fact as a mother I teach my children to use good manners at all times.

My children get away with not minding their manners when it's an accident, if it's not in public and they say excuse me. So my point is, finally, that although my kids have manners they do occasionally burp on their sister, share whispering secrets, and sing at the table....however we have put our foot down on that one, cause, parents knew what they were doing that time, the singing sucks more than it sounds good, so it's just a rule for the parents sanity! Yes, my parents were strict with manners but what I am trying to say is pick your you want your kids to have good manners or your grandchildren? Because in my parents case their kids had perfect manners, but when let loose into the big wide world, when offspring were involved...their grandchildren get to slide because the rules were too strict and I don't want to battle the manners 24/7.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Alter Egos

Why is it that when Garth Brooks, or Beyonce have alter egos it gets them more famous and more money? But when I have all these other personalities all I get are numbers handed to me for local therapists?

I remember one day I was driving in our truck by myself, the music was loud, the view was Montana at it's best. I called Steve and told him I had to turn the music down because all the voices in my head were too loud! He was scared and asked if I was serious, I told him I was kidding....but he'll never know if that's really the truth!

I was telling my husband that at my funeral I want him to read an hour of Erma Bombeck, then say thank you for coming....cause that's all I would want! If anyone ever compared me to her, I told him (as I had tears in my eyes) I could die!

Meet Mofsi

I would like to introduce you to an insecure, heavy around the middle, not so much an ugly duckling (but one quack away) mother of five...that is convinced she's a Supermodel inside! Call her Mofsi for short. She is me and I am her, though we might refer to each other as the "other one!" This will be necessary for blaming and embarrassing each other. It's a Beyonce sort of thing. "Sasha Fierce" is her alter ego so that she can dance and be a diva, though she tries to convince you that she is nothing like Sasha! What it comes down to is not owning up to who you are and things you don't want people to know you have done, are doing, or want to do! Everyone follow? It's a messed up world and that's where I come in I am Starla. My passion is writing, my obsession is writing, after pushing my kids out the window during a fire, my writing books would come next....I am sure Steve (my husband) can take care of himself; if not the kids and I get to go on a vacation with the money from his estate. Oh, wait there is none! Okay so I would become a single mom. So I guess in the instance of a fire, I would save the kids, the husband, the writing books and then the dog (this is subject to change as soon as he does, and convinces me he is worth saving sooner)! I own over 130 books on how to write. How many have I written? A big fat 0, the conclusion I have come to is that all the writing books are the same but I just know that there is one out there that will speak to me and say exactly what I need to hear to start the "Great American Novel." What they all have in common is that they tell me to write, but I don't, cause I am a chicken...ask my husband! The only thing I have managed to accomplish is making the career choices for my daughters, they want to be writers....hopefully they won't watch and learn from me! When I thought of writing this blog, everything inside me shut down, I wasn't even sure I could spell my own name, I wanted to vomit....nerves and sweats overcame me and I thought to myself. I'll do it tomorrow.